What’s Up Here?: How to Recognize in Three Easy Steps
We are all familiar with the dreaded ice breaker, “Share something interesting about yourself.” I no longer dread this situation because when this question arises, I share the same fun fact every time.
My interesting tidbit is that people often mistakenly recognize me as someone they’ve met before. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve heard, “You look so familiar to me. Have we met?” and 99% of the time, we have not. The person is a total stranger to me.
When it comes to recognizing our difficult emotions and feelings, I want you to have a better track record. You don’t want you to feel like these sensations are strangers. You also don’t want to miss identify something as anger when it’s really fear. Or to ignore it all together.
In order to get really good at recognizing what’s going on in your own little microcosm, you need to practice. Here’s how:
Steps to Recognize:
Pause
Acknowledge
Scan
Pause: Pause for just a moment. This is where we are practicing NOTICING what is going on.
Acknowledge: Acknowledge that something is up here. For many people, they’ve grown so accustomed to stuffing or numbing the uncomfortable feelings, they aren’t always aware they’re having them until they’re knee deep in Frito Lays or four drinks in at the local bar.
Scan: Check in with your body and your brain. Do a quick scan of your body first. Start with the front of your body at the top of your head. Move your attention down your face, to your neck, shoulders, chest, out to your arms, across the top of your hands to your fingertips. Move to your belly, your pelvis, your thighs, knees, lower legs, across the tops of your feet and out the tips of your toes.
Once you finish scanning the front, go back to the top of your head and scan the back of your body. Roll your attention over the back of your head, the neck, the shoulders, your middle back, lower back, your buttocks, your thighs, the back of your knees, your calves, the bottom of your feet and out your toes again.
What do you notice as you scan your body? Where is something showing up? Does your chest feel tight? Flushed face? Pit in the stomach? This is just a quick once over. Just notice what comes up.
Check in with your brain: What is coming up in your mind. Are your thoughts racing? Is your brain shutting down?
The goal of the Recognize stage is to learn how to NOTICE what is going on. We’ll dive deeper into all of it later. But at first, I just want you to get really good at noticing.
Next, we’ll talk about the second step in RAIN: Allow. Do you have trouble allowing difficult and uncomfortable emotions to hang out with you? Do you find that you either obsess over things or stuff that hard things way down so it can’t see the light of day? Congratulations! You, my friend, are totally human.
*************************************************************************************************************
Would you like to take this information to the next level? Fill out a contact form and let’s talk soon.